August 25, 2021
Written by David Petty
Now I appeal to you, brothers and sisters, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you be in agreement and that there be no divisions among you, but that you be united in the same mind and the same purpose. - First Corinthians 1:10
“Any law enforcement officer,” says Methodist Bishop William Willimon, “will tell you that he or she would rather try to stop a bank robbery than intervene in a domestic argument.” He goes on to point out the familiar finding that more people are murdered by relatives than by strangers.
My interest here is not disputes in your biological family, or in mine or in the one in the trailer down the road. I’m concerned here about disagreements in the church family. Christians have disagreed from New Testament times to the present, and as we are currently aware our situation is no exception.
And yet many times Christians have managed their disagreements without a lasting division. At what point is our support of what we believe to be the truth overruled by our recognition that God treasures everyone, even those with whom we disagree?
Surely the first difficult step, as Paul suggested (Ephesians 4:31), is to let go of anger. Trying to have a conversation with another Christian without cooling our anger is a bit like trying to drive uphill without turning on the engine. Much the same thing can be said about fear and other negative emotions.
But if we do rid ourselves of the anger, fear, cynicism, etc., what do we replace it with? Here’s my suggestion: the willingness to be surprised. If we enter arguments willing to be surprised by what the other person really believes, and by how our own beliefs might change, I think we can reach general agreement quite often (surprisingly often.)
We should seek counsel from those around us who are notable more for the wisdom of their words than for the volume of their voices. (This is not to deny that, whichever view we take, there will be people on our side with loud voices.). Often the best answer to a difficult choice is to look for a third alternative —or a fourth or a fifth.
Nor should we underestimate the power of prayer or of the Holy Spirit. Perhaps these are really the same thing; perhaps good prayer is just hearing what the Spirit says.
Gracefully submitted,
David Petty